Put the stress on any one of those four words!

I firmly believe that the loss of Communities and Community Spirit has been largely responsible for the 'epidemic' of depressive illness that has swept our country since the war and especially in the last 25 years.  I have been a depressive for the last 10 years, that is to say, kept just afloat by a daily dose of an SSRI* which prevents the onset of the illness, for that's what it is.

I came here last December just as it got into its stride and have been here ever since.  You could say I'm an addict:  I say its my job [I am retired, BTW].  The dynamics of the Wall are such that one gets to know really well, people of ones own [wall-joining] vintage.  And whilst I will apply myself to needy people as time permits, newer blood will take over from us where necessary and will form their own more intimate groups.

For the last three days I have had no need of my SSRI - just didn't even remember to take it.  I feel wonderfully renewed and refreshed:  my life feels exciting and full;  my 'wife' finds a happy enthusiastic man when she comes through the door instead a sullen, morose, gloomy albatross.  I have friends here who I love and who say they love me; I have a daily flood of news and events;  I have thought provoking discussions with people who never offend or criticize, who are honest, open and willing to say it how it really is;  my brain is constantly exercised in my efforts to help resolve problems or post usefully;  at any hour of the day or night I can interact with people I know and who know me.  And I'm in competition with no-one for anything.  WHERE in the so-called 'real' world can you find a fraction of that?

As Roze said some weeks ago 'This Community has changed my life'.


* SSRI = Selective Serotonin Re-uptake Inhibitor  - Things like Prozac, Cipramil, Seroxat

Oh BB - what a wonderful post. It does get harder - but not impossible - to find community offline these days. I had never seen you as an Albatross but it is clear that - the less morose form :)) - does show us the way to land here at times. I find The Wall a great place for support and conversations that are meaningful, engaging and warm. I do find that offline too but somehow The Wall is what it says - a place for support when life is a wee bit shaky or for finding deep connection across all the usual social and geographical borders in life.

It is simply amazing that you are off medications - and it makes me doubly sure that medication is often a poor substitute for meaningful relationship with self and other. Perhaps - like the new study by American psychiatrist Dr Block on the Internet and texting being a new mental illness - we are all participating in a mass addiction - but actually i think the guy is bonkers - shall we send him the url of Big White Wall?

Hi BB! I'm so happy to hear that your life is looking up.

(( hug ))

Now, concerning the good doctor...

I have very strong convictions about internet addiction vs internet obsession.

I wrote a blog about it last year and how it pertained to people who game specifically. Here is someone elses feedback on the entry:

• 
  I think the key determinant in assessing whether a problem exists is whether or not there is compulsive behavior. Do we play because we choose to do so, or is it compulsive behavior? No matter how much time you spend in any activity, I don't think there is addiction or obsession as long as you are choosing to do it because you want to, not because you "need" to. Even if someone begins to neglect other responsibilities, it may still not be addiction. It may simply be irresponsibility. Determining whether behavior is compulsive or rational can be difficult I suppose, but assuming there is an addiction simply because of the time invested or the enthusiasm displayed is ridiculous.

And my reply:

• 
  .....Even if someone begins to neglect other responsibilities, it may still not be addiction. It may simply be irresponsibility...... I like this thought, but... If the choice came down to taking personal responsibility or being diagnosed with an "addiction" - how many people would choose to take responsibility for their actions? Maybe gamers themselves are to blame for some of this??

I still think people would rather be diagnosed with a non-existant addiction so that they don't have to take responsibility for their issues. And our medical/psychological establishment takes advantage of this.

Therefore, I am not addicted to The Wall.

I am not obsessed with The Wall.

I just enjoy logging on and talking to my new friends and creating bricks. I take full responsibility for all my actions and non-actions in 'real life' that result from my hanging out here. 

BB, you have summed up this place perfectly.

I first came here at the start of November 2007 after hearing one of the founders on BBC Radio London. At the time I was feeling very low, not for the first time in my life, but for the same reason - I felt I had spent my entire married life with the wrong woman. You know the story so I'm not going to repeat it but the point is that really I came here looking for someone to give me that final kick up the arse which would have seen me walk out.

What I found was a group of people who did not criticise or condem, they just listened, questioned and most of all made me think about things in a different way. I don't really know how, but that's what happened and now, 5 months on, I have a depth of feeling for my wife that I never thought possible again and my marriage is well on the way to recovery, even surviving a quite traumatic incident just a few weeks ago, you know the story, and I truly believe that if that had happened last November, I would not be with my wife now.

I also like to think that I have put something back as well and that really closes the circle on the definition of a real community.

I like it here, long may it last, if only so that we can find out what pet Roze finally gets.

Thank you all for your most generous compliments.  I seem to have started some other hares running - Both Thorn and UM have been diverted onto their favourite topics - both of which deserve TAs of their own.  I've got lots to say about both - I expect we all have.

All of you make enormous contributions here and its you that keep it forging ahead:  its you who keep it well presented, well thought out, carefully written and a pleasure to read. 

I reserve a special commendation for Roze who does so much to look after people despite her own problems and who without fail, welcomes EVERY newcomer, posts on EVERY new brick.  What a player, Roze.

I love you all.  BB