Comments

• 05/08/2008 @ 20:44 Overseas said

  

  I love the picture you've used for your brick. I like this kind of atmosphere.

  Now about your brick story, I can tell you that I've been their too. On the web my only address to "meet" new people is BWW. I've never tried myself MySpace and Facebook, and I'm not much inspired by them. I often thought I had friends, maybe some of them were for a while, but most were not. With all my questionings I've had to understand who I am, why and how those so-called were, why, and why was I so frustrated in my relationships with them I've finally understood that I don't fit in this kind of life. Fortunately for me, many of my thoughts and beliefs were later confirmed by different books I've read

  So, what are you doing wrong ? you ask. Well, although I don't know you at all, maybe you are doing nothing wrong with these people. Perhaps you are not looking at the right place or level to meet new friends. Perhaps something in the way you are, your expectations maybe, is pushing people away from you. I don't know. Don't forget that a lot of people want an easy-going, bright and funny life. Everything that is not like that is more or less abruptly rejected because of the fears it causes. Perhaps you are much too worthy to fit into these peoples popular cliques that are doing what is necessary to be admitted into the pack.

  These are just some of my thoughts. Worthy, unworthy ? You choose, but don't give up.

  Cheers, Os

• 06/08/2008 @ 03:58 Jomo said

  

  I have a lot of friends. Some of them I have had for many years - others for a very short time. But they have come from all different directions and ways - I come across unexpected friendships - which is really good, I now think - though once I sought friendship with people, now I do not.

  Friendships happen to me I guess, rather than forming in other ways. Remaining open to people, liking people a lot, and being very interested in them helps - listening and being still with them -

  I don't know if that helps -
  

• 06/08/2008 @ 10:43 ant said

  

  Hello anon.

  This is a really big question. I am not so interested in meeting people on FaceBook though I have an account - I just use it to stay in contact with a swag of friends that I don't have enough time to telephone and keep in contact with.

  I think true blue friendship needs a deep connection and I have only found this in real life. Are you involved in real life groups where you can connect with people that you have common interests with? Don't give up ant.

• 06/08/2008 @ 18:50 Anonymous said

  

  Thanks to those who took the time to read my post and express their caring thoughts. I think this is coming from the fact that I recently got married and saw my closest friends again at my wedding after being away for a few years, and realized how much I really miss them. I moved away 5 years ago and have made some casual friends in my new location, but no one whom I really feel a close connection with. Also, I recently decided to stop searching for friends on Internet sites such as Craigs List, Kupple.com and letsbefriends.net as I have not been successful with them. I am also looking for friends whom I share common interests and values with which has been lacking with my casual friends. Awhile back I joined some Yahoo meetup groups but the groups dwindled due to lack of interest. Now two years later, I have decided to give it a try again and signed up for a few groups, so I will see what happens. I know that friendship takes time to grow and I need to be open to people who bring different experiences to the table, so I am going to take one step at a time and go from there. I also think my friendship issues stem alot from low self esteem, an introverted personality and being hurt by friends in the past which causes me to be more cautious. But deep down I know that good friends do exist and hopefully one day soon, I will find them and start connecting on a deeper level.

• 10/08/2008 @ 10:21 ant said

  

  Hey Anon, I wonder if by being cautious new acquaintances might feel uncertain of how to get to know you? I don't know how that might be "felt" on the internet sites but I hope you haven't given up trying to meet people in your new local area - well not so new now is it? Sometimes things happen and someone you didn't connect with last year might be doing something which is more meaningful to you now. Perhaps there is a local charity which you could support and volunteer some time with - that might put you in connection some new folk.

  Do you think that you are finished in the dealing of the past hurts or are these feelings still with you? ant.

• 01/11/2008 @ 17:34 joyce said

  

  hi anon. im new to this site and i felt on level with your brick, i have lots of other issues in my life too.som of the answers you had i found interesting too.im glad iv found this site to see im really not alone in this world of unhappy people

• 02/11/2008 @ 02:55 Anonymous said

  

  Since I posted my brick in May, I have bought a house and moved to a new town within the past 2 months. It has been a struggle trying to get together with friends who live 20-40 miles away now. On a positive note, I have rekindled a couple of friendships with women who live closer to me which gives me joy and comfort. I have also joined some Yahoo Meetup groups so I hope to gain some new friends this way. I am struggling with other issues such as finding a new career path so I have been busy trying to find a job which will make me happy. I know in time, things will come together so I am taking one day at a time and not worry so much. Some days are better than others, but it is comforting to know that there are others out there who share similar struggles in their friendships as I do, and can offer one another an ear to listen. I think we all just want to find authentic individuals who will appreciate and accept us for who we are, and not who they expect us to be. I'm learning that life is a journey and not simply a destination. You also have to be present and in the moment and not constantly looking in your rearview mirror of regret or fastforwarding your life in the future. I know that there are good friends out there and it takes time for them to develop and gradually grow closer over time. I just need to be patient and not try so hard to make things happen but be myself and walk confidently and carefree through friendship forest with no expectations but be open to possibilities, whatever they may be.

• 02/11/2008 @ 09:52 UMxx said

  

  Hello Joyce - I'm glad that you've found the wall - welcome.

  And anon - wow in 6 months you have achieved a lot - and reconnecting with old friends for me is such a joy - so I am glad that you have been able to do that.

  Yes life is a journey - and there is so much happening on the way - so much to notice and be mindful of. Good luck in finding a job that meets your needs and keep telling us how you are going.

  UM xxx