Oh NO!

harmony

Brick created on 29/08/2008 @ 21:54

Your brick story

I've hurt someone .

Someone did something and wrote me an email about it and I was so p***** off with her that I wrote an email to my line manager, who happens to be my MD. I was already very stressed and emotionally in a mess and instead of responding to her and saying something angry, I offloaded to my MD about her and sent HER the email mail in error!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!

This was on 5th August and I only heard about it tonight in an email from MD. She must have told him. I can't believe I send her the email. SElf saboatge or what?

She will be so hurt. I don't know her very well, I only see her once every 2 months but she is a really lovely person and I've caused her pain and I need to find a way to reach out to her.

Thank goodness I didn't say anything abusive about her or call her anything nasty, but I did say say I was furious at her and felt undermined and stupid about what she did and told MD he should give her a particular role that I play because I can't do it with her involved.

What can I do to make it easier for her?

Actually, the only thing I did wrong was make the mistake of emailing the message to her - I felt how I felt, which was furioulsy angry at the time, but that will have made her feel very hur. This is a woman who looked up to me - I've fallen off the pedastel and onto her head, I think.

Suggestions for reparations on a PC please.

I've suggested to MD he sack me and boil my head in oil, bit I sort of think he wants me to find a solution that doesn't involve either boiling oil or me moving to NZ on Monday.

What a lesson for the person who strives so hard to make sure she looks after everyone. I've only just won the company award for being the most popular manager: I think I've just blown that big style!! How to humilate yourself, or what?

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Comments

30/08/2008 @ 11:00 harmony said

Thank you for the good advice, Ant.
I have no problem with apologising and accepting responsibility. I knew I was too angry to talk to her at the time and I avoided dealing with her and just unloaded in an email to my line manager. The original issue was that following a meeting that I chair and she attends, she wrote an email about a publication I'd suggested all the centres should obtain; in the email, which she distributed to all managers, she wrongly stated that the publication I suggested was out of date -and I felt undermined and stupid. I was already feeling very stressed, was full of suicidal thoughts and was a bit 'off my head' at the time -and basically messed things up by not dealing with it effectively.
I think your idea is a good one. I've already aplogised to MD although I'm sure he is more concerned about my mental state than any apology.

I'd like to be ready to deal with it by Monday morning so I have until tomorrow to think more about it.
Thanks again.
Love Harmony
30/08/2008 @ 11:18 harmony said

THe NEW Zealand Ref id about leaving work and escaping to my sister in New Zealand, She live sin Whagarei in the North Island ansd I haven't see her in 12 years. My idea of getting away frrm it all is to go there - it's pure fantasy: I detest travelling and the idea of a day on a plane, well!
x Harmony
30/08/2008 @ 11:48 Jomo said

Harmony - escaping to New Zealand isn't such a bad idea - look at it on-line - that is what I do with Cornwall - walk the coast on-line. Sometimes the beautiful scenery and poetry of the history moves me into another place.
I am sorry that you feel so bad about all this - you have really been going through a lot lately, with memories and therapy - so maybe you self-sabotaged, maybe you just made a mistake.

It is done now, that is the thing - I guess just deal with it as you would like it dealt with if it was the other way round - how you would like someone to sort it out with you, if it had happened to you, instead of her.
I wonder if she sent the email to your MD because she wanted to "report you" or if maybe because it was speaking to him, so she sent it to where it should have been sent?
I guess if I got something like that at work I would have approached the person who sent it first - if I felt I could - or I would simply send it to where it should have gone in the first place? I dunno. I really don't.
But - don't beat yourself up too much, eh. Your work is obviously good, and you are appreciated for it, so this glitch can be sorted, I reckon.
Love
Jo
03/09/2008 @ 11:06 ant said

The North Island is a bit warmer too -esp around Napier.
I think that NZ is just beautiful - weird place though - no snakes, no spiders - wonder what they do when they go walking - look at the views??
03/09/2008 @ 11:10 harmony said

Got it all sorted out - aplologies all round and no hard feelings.
Will put NZ on back burner for another while!
03/09/2008 @ 11:20 ant said

What are you apologising for - I was just getting a list of web sites for you to check out!
What about a visit - a fact finding mission - a search conference?
03/09/2008 @ 11:23 Jomo said

Glad there are no hard feelings at work. Too many people put NZ on the back burner - they should go there - it is a really beautiful place. I should know, I have seen it on-line...
03/09/2008 @ 11:24 Jomo said

Glad there are no hard feelings at work. Too many people put NZ on the back burner - they should go there - it is a really beautiful place. I should know, I have seen it on-line...
03/09/2008 @ 11:34 Jomo said

Helen Clark, the Prime Minister of New Zealand was supposedly asked about the huge influx of Kiwis who are moving to Australia in droves [yes, you people who do not live in Oz, there are a great number of Kiwis who live in Oz now].
She is supposed to have replied "Yes - thereby raising the IQ level of both countries..."
Dunno if it is true - but I love it as a retort!
Which country first gave women the vote?
04/09/2008 @ 19:22 harmony said

I meant co worker and I had made apologies and there were no hard feelings between us
05/09/2008 @ 06:48 ant said

New Zealand!!!!!!!
And I think Helen Clarke is a marvel - I wanted to vote to cede all our powers to NZ - but unfortuately the shape of the party system in NZ - all first passed the post and no upper house will be her undoing.
She really gives those blokes on the business round table curry,=. And apparently the americans still haven't worked out she is serious when she has a go at them.
This is a country attacked by the French - might be little but boy they are gutsy. I love them.