Comments

• 28/04/2008 @ 02:46 UMxx said

  

  Dear Thorn,
  Just feeling like you are getting an even break in life is not getting to "happily ever after" - I think you've had a rotten year and now you are dealing with another crisis - I hope that your love will heal and recover.

  I guess I agree that making bricks doesn't help - well not in the way that how we feel miraculously changes - but maybe it is just a bit of release to express it.

  I'm sending all of my best wishes to you and your love for wellness - everything I can muster.

  UM xx

• 28/04/2008 @ 06:19 thorn said

  

  Thank you so much UM. I've never had a happily-ever-after or even came close, but last year was good and it seems this year is going to be the yang to it's yin.

  I want my love to get better too. He has another appointment this week so hopefully we will find out what is wrong soon. The good thing is that the Veteran's Administration Hospitals are near here. The bad thing is that we are dealing with the VA.

  He was in the first Gulf War and he has had health issues ever since, but our wonderful government doesn't admit that Gulf War Syndrome exists. His heart has been damaged and now he is having issues with his kidneys (both common to GWS) and the VA has lost his medical records twice so none of this is documented in the government records.

  It's one more stress in my life. I hate dealing with bureaucracy.

• 28/04/2008 @ 08:19 UMxx said

  

  Oh Thorn, you poor thing - and how awful that your government doesn't acknowledge what damage - physically and mentally is done to those who go to War. I know that we have some advantage in the way that our servicemen are represented and cared for - not that it cures the illnesses or the pain. But we have a "gold" medical system without charge for all service related injuries and illnesses. It's been a fight here around GWS but the organisation that supports service people has real power and influence - and it covers many generations. And for the carers of these personnel, we have special assistance and support. If a serviceman dies of any related issue - his or her carer receives the continued medical access and a higher pension than they would otherwise receive.

  I think it is because we are a small country- we lost one man in Afghanistan today - our first and it is a bleak day. I am anti war but not anti those who go and fight.

  I hate it most that people give up so much and if they return, they are invisible to the government that sends them and their successors.

  I would just once love a magic wand - just to get rid of the stress - and maybe to improve the efficiency of your VA.

  thinking of you
  UM

  
  

• 28/04/2008 @ 13:43 Wolfie said

  

  Hello Thorn. This sucks big time. I really feel for you and your love and i hope they figure out what's wrong and that he can start the road to recovery soon. Not sure what to say - but just sending you a very big hug - you have had a time of it. Wx

• 28/04/2008 @ 20:27 thorn said

  

  Thanks UM and Wolfie. It will get better, it's just become 'one of those years.'

• 01/05/2008 @ 22:09 thorn said

  

  Well... The doctors still don't know what is wrong with him, so they have scheduled exploratory surgery next week.

  I am stressing out even though everyone is telling me not to borrow trouble. I don't know how I'm not supposed to be worried.

  I love him.

  He's ill.

  Of course I'm going to worry.

• 01/05/2008 @ 22:42 UMxx said

  

  Yes of course you are going to be worried - I don't understand that message about don't worry, itt'll be fine - it generally makes me think that people think I am an idiot.

  I just read your post about asking for comfort and someone said no - I'm sorry about that. I hope you find a way to receive some comfort at this time. I'm a blanket and cat person myself and the cat rarely complains.

  I am thinking of you thorn and wishing hard for you and your love. Let us know when the surgery is so we can all throw in our support.
  Take care and here' s the biggest hug I can send. UM x

• 01/05/2008 @ 22:54 Wolfie said

  

  Of course you are going to worry - but I love that phrase 'borrow trouble' ... is it possible to worry in moderation?

  The positive thing is that he will be one step closer to getting better and you will be closer to knowing what to worry about. I always find it easier to have a source of my worry as I tend to think only of the worst.

  Keep in touch thorn - we care about you and we care about what is wrong with your love.

  With hugs and best wishes,

  Wolfie x

• 02/05/2008 @ 10:02 Brown Bear said

  

  Hello Thorn, I only realised when you told me a couple of weeks ago, that your love was in more serious trouble that you admitted. I'm so sorry to learn the full story and of your distress. I have always loved the little adage 'Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof' - its so succinct and so gently phrased. Although you are well aware of the prospects - it just might not happen and he could make a full recovery.

  I feel so angry that your government [and ours too] is, so far, successfully denying the problem. We need UM to start rattling cages big time.

  But whatever happens, you know that you have the love and care of all of us here who know you well. BB

• 02/05/2008 @ 13:54 thorn said

  

  Thanks BB, UM, and Wolfie.

  We are going to pre-register him this morning and then I need to go pick out some yarn. (I knit when I'm stressed).

  I don't know if I've mentioned it, but I'm a big Robert E. Howard fan and the hospital where my love is having his surgery is the one where REH's mother was treated. I always think of him when I go there.

• 02/05/2008 @ 19:33 Isabella said

  

  Hi Thorn, I'm so sorry to hear of all your distress in this time. It's really serious. Someone authoritive told me that it might be the uranium that poisons the body and the fact that the hospital records went missing twice, does not seem like a coincidence to me. Is there no way one can test the veteran's at independent hospitals and form some sort of class action suit against the government or something? From a medical perspective I'm sure you're finding out if there is something to counteract the symptoms and begin the healing. I don't know. I have no knowledge of this. If there's anything i can do, even if it's just finding out what legal options one might have, may be a start.
  If there's anything, please shout. You are always in my thoughts. Love Isabella

• 02/05/2008 @ 22:46 UMxx said

  

  Thinking of you Thorn. UMx

• 03/05/2008 @ 18:42 roze said

  

  Sounds really tough thorn. Hang on in there and let us know how he and you are doing. Hugs roze

• 06/05/2008 @ 22:26 zorro said

  

  Hugs Thorn - hope everything works out OK. Thinking of you xx

• 06/05/2008 @ 23:03 thorn said

  

  Thanks everyone. This week has been hard and I really appreciate the good thoughts.

  I'm not sleeping so I'm cleaning and recleaning everything at night.

  There is a new medical trend here - giving a date but not a time for surgery. My friend is scheduled for surgery on the 13th and my love is scheduled on the 9th, but neither of them know the exact time of their surgery. They were both told "Give us a call the day before to find out what time we need you." (they are going to different hospitals).

  I think this is an insane policy.

• 07/05/2008 @ 00:37 UMxx said

  

  Oh yes this is a global approach to surgical efficiency - (not effectiveness) - It is one of the ways of trying to manage the waiting lists by taking the key decisions away from the surgeons - it gives greater power for the health insurance companies, hospitals, then surgeons and theatre staff, and somewhere at the end the patient. There is about a 5% carry over from displacing scheduled operations to take account of emergency surgery over here - and we are meant to have a reasonable system. OUr experience is that even if you ring up they can't make a concrete commitment to the actual time of the operation but they want to hear so they can organise admission.

  I was thinking of you this morning about having to implement your throw out stuff every day approach. I'm not surprised you are in a cleaning frenzy. take care with the cleaning chemicals! xx UM

• 07/05/2008 @ 01:35 thorn said

  

  UM, Is it on a first come first serve basis? If I call early will I get an early appointment?

  I still think this is insane.

  Today I threw out a shower curtain and donated a lamp and some clothing. I'm slowly but surely getting the clutter under control.

  I don't use many chemicals, mostly baking soda, vinegar, and bleach. You'd be surprised how many cleaning solutions you can do away with if you use these three items. Laundry and dishwashing detergents are my most used chemicals, but they are as green as I can get them.

• 07/05/2008 @ 02:15 UMxx said

  

  Hey Thorn,

  I don't think it is first serve - and yes it is insane - it is not about the patient - it is about the business of health. In fact I think it borders on the immoral.

  Well we are the same about cleaning. I won't use shampoo or conditioner anymore - read about all the shit they contained and the common ingredients like engine degreasers and so on and just felt that the sewer system could do with less. I use baking soda and vinegar on my hair too - I think it is fine - just a bit funny when I travel.

  I have to keep away from too much bleach though - my lungs hate ammonia. I tend to use sugar soap when I can. What I really want is a sunscreen I can use - the only alternative someone suggested was the membrane around a boiled egg - still trying to workout how many dozen eggs I need to be safe in the sun. I settle for keeping covered as a result. I had better attack my housework you have made me look up and I can see books and dvds multiplying before my eyes.

  UM