Comments

• 02/05/2008 @ 10:33 UMxx said

  

  Hi charley, this is very sad for you and your uncle. I hope that there is still time for you and he to do the talking that you need him to hear while he can. Dementia is a very scary disease for the person who has it - it is also very hard for those who love them - it's grief while still having the person with us physically but still having lost them. thinking of you and sending you a big hug UM

• 03/05/2008 @ 20:45 roze said

  

  Hello charley - welcome - i have not seen you here before. How is your uncle now? It is so very hard to face the loss of someone who is still physically present in the world. Thinking of you, love roze

• 03/05/2008 @ 23:16 charley said

  

  Thank you both for your welcome and kind words. I've found this site at just the right time in my life I think. I can't describe how sad I am for my uncle. He's such a wonderful man and has been like a father to me since childhood. So far he's been compliant with what I'm asking of him but thats causing a conflict in me...on one hand its makes life easier, but on the other he's always been very stubborn, independent and private..the fight just seems to have gone from him. I think its worse because this is what I do professionally but now I'm seeing it first hand from the Carers perspective. I know exactly what the future holds because this is what I do at work..prepare people for this future..and now its our future. Charley

• 04/05/2008 @ 00:29 UMxx said

  

  Hey charley, sometimes I have found myself wondering whether it is harder knowing the course that a disease will take or discovering it on the way. My husband has Parkinsons and when he was diagnosed I was in and out of nursing homes all week and able to observe residents with PD. It really did my head in.

  Maybe your uncle has lost some fight or maybe it is because he knows that you love him and know about this disease and trusts you. Either way it is really tough and doesn't make it easier for either of you. Here's another big hug. UM xx

• 04/05/2008 @ 06:05 roze said

  

  Your uncle sounds so very special. I feel like that about my uncle who lived with us always - whilst my father was quite absent due to being an alcoholic and heavy user of prescribed tranquillisers. How did your uncle come to be so central in your life?

  Being a carer first hand is so very tough. I am wondering whether your professional expertise feels like a help in this circumstance and/or something more difficult - as you know what will happen? Recently my closest friend has become a carer - quite unexpectedly (but not for the first time in her life) of her partner who has a terminal diagnosis for cancer. Being with her through this reminds me just how all-consuming caring is and so desperately hard when you see the essential character of the person you love changing or becoming lost to you. Are there others around who are going to be sharing the caring with you?