Missing a beautiful woman

UMxx

Brick created on 13/08/2008 @ 00:45

Your brick story

Police still outnumber the residents in my street - we have officers from the riots squad combing the footpaths and nature strip, the road itself, backyards and every crevice has been peered into.

I got home having ducked out for a moment to buy apples - at the moment we seem to eat 3 kgs of apples a day - but when I drove back into the street - there were police tape across the block and I could see that my house was taped together with my neighbours - not something that I have seen before in the neighbourhood and not something I want to see again.

The police - both uniformed and plain clothes were signing in residents and escorting us to our homes. Cars had to be left down the road to preserve the site. My dear neighbour made to come out and help me with my groceries - already halved with the plain clothes officer but was quickly told to stay in his yard. She then apologised profusely to him explaining that at this early stage we needed to try not to disturb anything. And no, we weren't under house arrest - just asked to be escorted in and out.

When I signed in, one of the officers muttered that it would be okay to let me in as I was the second house up - so as soon as we were out of ear shot - I said to the detective - "please don't tell me something horrible has happened to my lovely neighbours!" She answered in the way of a person experienced at avoiding questions - "Do you know them?" "Yes I do and I'm thinking the absolute worse since you avoided the question - are they both okay or has one been hurt or worse?" I got a "look" and returned one straight back at her. Is it Su? I don't give up and she said she was sorry but that the police were treating the site as a homicide location.

Do you know that feeling when it feels like all of the blood in your body has been passed through a chiller? From finger tips to toes and back through the limbs to the stomach starts to feel as if it is freezing? Death is never something to embrace but murder of a woman who I was fond of - no!

My neighbours and I had a short conversation - mostly half sentances and unfinished thoughts. Our neighbour Su had little english but always made such an effort to use the small amount she had. But she had the most wonderful smile - her whole face always lit up with such joy every time she smiled. There were smiles for everyone - the were huge beaming smiles that could be seen through the tinted windows of her car. Smiles for every passerby, I am going to miss those smiles on my dark days - they were the bit of light that used to make it through some of the thickest fog.

Our lives were interrupted often last night - calls from newspapers - perhaps not really newspapers but the gossip mongers wanting to find out if we had any comment to make about the murder. " There was a tone in the voice - the one used by gossipers and trouble makers - "you know some neighbours are saying that the police aren't telling residents anything - so they are very upset". Yeah I know how to agitate for a reaction too, sweetheart. "oh, yes - I am sitting here feeling awfully sad for because someone I am very fond of has died. I am confident that the police are doing what they need to - and I am only thinking of her husband in sons - Is that the sort of news story you want?" Full of apologies the reporter gabbled a chain of condolensces and said goodbye.

Is this news and public interest? Nothing yet is known for sure. My neighbours death has been refered to as a murder by a heavy blow to the head - and as a stabbing - and goodness knows what else by the end of the day. I can only hope that the family won't be getting those newspapers and being confronted by the stories - hopefully their own language newspapers spare them having to deal with these stories. The only time I have seen them the three men - husband and sons stood closely in a huddle - like they never would be separated.

They won't have any sense of what has happened until the coronial. It might sound childish but the best that we can hope for is that Su had a big internal bleed in her brain and then fell heavily. I don't want to think of her last moments being live in terror - or fear of being attacked.

Su's husband returned home and found her - what a memory to have to live with... does it fade in favour of better memories? My son Fred wants to know what happens when someone's last memory of the one they love is a bad one. All I can manage at the moment is to say that I hope that love takes over and allows a person to be able to think of the happier memories to.

Spare a thought for my nighbours in their loss - such good people who came to Australia, have worked hard and are good people and neighbours. They need all of the wishes and thoughts from us all today.

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Comments

13/08/2008 @ 01:59 cate said

Absolutely shocking news UM . I am thinking of your poor neighbor's family and you .
I too am hoping that this is not a crime scene and your friend Su passed away from natural causes . I'm sorry that journalism students aren't taught to be more sensitive. The last thing you need is to be hounded at a time of sadness and stress,
Sending lots of hugs
love, Cate xxxx
13/08/2008 @ 02:39 inspire said

Oh my, this is just terrible. My heart and thoughts go out to this family as well as those who cared for this woman. Such sadness in your part of of the world. I'm sorry you've had to experience this and that this family has too.
Sending much love and many hugs, hoping it reaches this family and their heart.
Love, Inspire xxx
13/08/2008 @ 06:54 roze said

Dearest UM this is an absolute tragedy and my heart goes out to Su's family and friends and your neighbourhood. I do so hope that the whole neighbourhood are able to show the family their support even by just leaving a candle alight in your windows as you are not allowed to disturb the scene. I am thinking of you all with much love, roze xxx
13/08/2008 @ 08:28 poppygirl said

Dear UM, I am so sorry for Su's family and everyone around you. I hope that everyone can support and help the family, now and in the future, even by being there for them is a great comfort. The world is full of terrible news, you just don't expect it to be on your doorstep. My thoughts are with you and the family, Love Poppygirl xxx Keep talking, that helps an awful lot.
13/08/2008 @ 19:57 Overseas said

... I'm shocked by what happened to Su. So much violence... And you UM, how are you doing ? Love, OS.
14/08/2008 @ 10:55 UMxx said

Well I am sad but I think also feeling angry about the way that a human's death has become a bit of a topic for gossip. The neighbours are becoming quite a strong group - it is clear that we are all going outside to meet with each other to talk about what happened and what is still happening.
The forensic squad are still there - the amount of effort of processing is impressive - they bought their own generators and we thought that was terribly odd - they are plugged into our power and are dealing with this situation in a way that I had not had to think of. Poor Choi's english seems to have suffered with the shock and they are being very decent to him - I guess I am touched by their capacity to deal with the human issues and not just be very efficient and effective at their job. The young officers look quite strained.
It's the people from further afield who are subscribing to all sorts of nonsense rumours - and I am cranky that they are insensitive enough to share their crazy ideas with me. My snipey comment to the reporter about being sad was actually printed - I guess that isn't a problem.
My neighbour came to visit tonight and sat down for a chat - after about 5 minutes he jolted himself and rang his wife next door to say that he was over here and had forgotten to tell her where he was going. We ended up talking about what would happened if we allowed our lives to be marked with fear. It is a common conversation now. I don't know why we are different - I don't feel under greater threat than before - nor does my husband and the kids have been great at telling the kids next door that we can't allow this to make us feel unsafe in our homes.
I really want to yell at the people who have been driving around and gawking at Choi's house - I am glad the front is covered with Police vans. When will he find peace? The last time I saw them together they were off to work and saying goodbye - I remember that really clearly the way they looked at each other - too conservative to kiss each other goodbye in public - but they look and the smile - I remember thinking how much they must really like each other. It's just the time that the little things come back. I think that by the time the funeral is held that there will be some sense that things are settling - for Choi's sake I hope he gets some information from the coroner - and that the papers give up on the reporting. Like all things it will take time. Thanks for your wishes and support love UMxx
15/08/2008 @ 08:38 cleo said

I truly do hope that some peace finds its way to your neighborhood. Your posts are a beautiful tribute to Su & Choi.
15/08/2008 @ 08:47 roze said

That mawkish interest in other's tragedies is quite sick. It sounds good that some of you are looking out for Choi's best interests. Take care. love roze